07 Surrender To Live

~Tamia~

“No need,” I replied, and he walked to me and looked into my eyes. I knew he was hurting, but his pain was nothing

compared to mine.

He was the one on the gaining side.

“I can’t let go, Tamia,” he said and placed his hands gently on my shoulders.

“It is normal to give up on a situation and someone you don’t understand, Tamia. I understand your anger and why you will flirt with Devin. I know you have a strong reason to give up on us, but I am asking you to give me a chance. I know we can make this work. I am willing to do anything for you, Tamia. I know I am

wrong, but tell me what to do to keep you.

I will do anything to keep you, Tamia. I was hoping you could teach me how. I will learn to be a better person for you please. Amanda was beyond my control. I am sorry. You know I tried. Please, Tamia,” He pleaded with me with tears in his eyes. 3

Leo went on his knees and hugged my legs.

“Please, Tamia. I am trying to the best of my ability. Let me prove myself to you. Let me make it work,” He said in tears, and I knew he wouldn’t let up.

“Get up,” I said, and he stood up.

I looked up to see the hurt in his eyes. He was deeply conflicted.

“All you had to do was reject her, but instead, you let her father bully her way into our home. You left our bed and went to her. You pushed me aside. I thought I would have to share, but you didn’t even

leave room for that. You abandoned me. I am a laughing stock. Most pack members do not even respect me anymore. As far as they are concerned, I am no longer their Luna. What do you want me to do, Leo? How do you want me to cope? You should let me go. If you love me, you will reject me and let me go. You have to reject one of us, and that will be me, Leo. Let me get over you in peace,” I said, and he shook

his head.

My heart was breaking too.

We were so good together. I had many happy memories with Leo.

Why did this happen to us? My heart was breaking.

He leaned close to me and kissed me on

my lips.

I let him because I needed comfort. It was

a messed up situation.

He was the cause of my pain, and he was giving me comfort.

My body needed it. I kept telling myself, just this once, Tamia’.

Somehow trying to justify what was about to happen between us. He was my husband, and it shouldn’t feel wrong.

My body ached, and he was right when he implied that I was aroused, but I still

wanted him.

So I threw caution to the wind and

wrapped my legs around him. I knew it was going to be a long night. Kaira purred in my head.

He was trying to get another chance, but

this was my goodbye to him. I just had

one more month before receiving a

response from a southern Alpha, to

whom I sent a request.

Once it comes, I will leave regardless of what it says. It was for the best. Seeing the way Leo was, he wouldn’t be able to

let go of me, and neither would he let

Amanda go. I had to decide for him. So I set aside my grudge and gave him access. I allowed him to make love to me.

Leo made love to me all through the night. It was as if he was auditioning, trying to make me remember.

I never forgot how I felt about him. I just ignored my feelings, so I didn’t hurt more than I was already.

There was nothing wrong with what we were doing. He was my husband, but I was scared because the more I let myself enjoy it, the more hurt I would be when I woke up alone on my bed.

Leo went four rounds with me that night until I couldn’t take anymore. I wondered

from. It reminded me

times. Times I knew were gone

forever.

woke up. To my

to me in bed.

up in my eyes,

would wake up to this sight of him every morning before I went on my runs. Fate had

my robe to cover my body when someone suddenly

knew it was Amanda. What was

door. Why was she banging

up abruptly and looked at me.

morning,” he said, and the

He looked at me, unsure if he should open the door or not. I wanted to see him

got up and went

it, and Amanda

gently walked her out. I could allow anything,

between Amanda and Leo

was explosive.

married and insisted. I

neglect my wife, Amanda.” He said,

have to accept that it will be like this,” he said, and I heard

said, using

half rejection. I

him if

take it. The only

me was

Alphas,

one would want their women, but in his case, Alpha

he could take me

All I had to do

to accept the challenge.

Devin. He has to bow out and reject me regarding a challenge. He put on all that sports all night long to prove he could

for my needs. But we were past that. Great sex wasn’t going to make me change my mind about

it and never look back.

ahead, finish the

this shit,” I heard Leo tell her and I

was

how it will be around here

Tamia is my wife,

change that. If you can’t

a perfect life before all this fated shit happened, and then your father forced you into

gone against myself and the

this

far Tamia

built this

turn my back on her because I won’t.” He said, and tears welled up in my

returned to my room,

went to lie on the

not feel like doing much

To

me, and I smiled at him. My

his word and spent four nights a week in

of times, but she had

could not get involved. Everyone thought Leo would treat

were wrong. He

but Leo forced his wolf to comply. I could not bear Black’s pain, but

pack members gradually started giving

even blatantly

wanted to

before carrying out the task

had

going to the

Amanda

I did not care. Every

issue, I left it for

Amanda to attend.

Devin again, and a month passed quietly. 1

***

was a commotion in

wondered what

my office in a

rush.

Tamia, Northern Wolves from the Dark Alpha,” he said,

became scared.

asked,

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