Chapter 30: Love Confession The rain finally starts to fall, pattering against the window. The view outside is pitch black, with thunder and bright lightning looming within heavy cloud. I stand beside the glass door anxiously, staring into the darkness. No sane person would go swimming under this weather, unless he has a death wish. So Eason is crazy. Then why should I care so much about a crazy person?

The rest of the group starts to play poker to kill the time. Their cheerful laughter only makes me more distracted. Eventually when James wins another round of the game and starts to shout out loudly about his victory, I can’t take it anymore and walk up to him.

“Aren’t you worried about him?” I ask sternly.

“Who?” James says absently as he shaffles the cards.

“Eason! He went swimming and it’s fucking raining!” I snap, “Aren’t you worried that something might happen to him? Aren’t you guys like close friends?” My tone is a bit too harsh. The rest of the group snaps their heads up to look at me, all startled by my reaction. After a short pause, Eddie speaks up, “Nat, the guy knows what he is doing. Plus, he was such an asshole to your earlier. So just leave him be.” “Yeah, Nat. Don’t worry about him,” Katherine nods. “He wouldn’t go swimming under this weather. He’s probably back to his own house already.”

I take in a deep breath and say nothing. Their comforts only build up the anxiety in my heart. James finishes shaffling and starts dealing the cards. He takes a quick glance at me and snickers, “I mean if you are so worried about him. Just call him. Or you can sit down with us and play poker. That’ll take your mind off him.” At this point, I don’t even know if I’m more worried about Eason or I’m more pissed about how indifferent James appears to his friend’s safety.

“Forget it,” I growl, “I’m going to bed.” I stride across the living room and head upstairs. After I enter my own room, I quickly close the door and take out my phone.

Yet my finger pauses at the dialing button.

Should I call him?

If he is already back at his own house and is currently lying on his bed safe and sound like Katherine said, calling him will only make me look like an idiot. I can already imagine his sarcastic tone when he picks up the call.

But…

I take one more look at the storm outside and dial his number.

He can’t laugh at me all he wants. But my consciousness won’t allow me to take that risk.

The dial tone goes busy for a long time.

He’s not picking up the phone.

deeper. Is he mad

the call and

(Where are you?]

are not actually

me know

seem pathetic, begging him

I’m so screwed.

roars down the sky with deafening booms. After ten painful minutes, I

No texts.

imagination goes wild. I can picture how he is struggling in water, fighting

That it.

dashing downstairs. The guys are still playing poker. They are all shocked to see me like

ignore them and run towards the door, as Katherine

back and open the entrance

with heavy raindrops, whipping against

wet land and start to call his name at the

muffled by the

the sheeting rain and gaze towards the sea. But except for the tempestuous waves, I got nothing. No

streaming down my face. And I don’t know if it’s rain or my tears. I’ve never felt so helpless in my

everything I’ve done and every word

I felt after our first night. He might laugh at me or even despise me, but at least I let him know my true feelings. But

of

my head around, afraid that it’s only

of

It’s him.

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