“I’ve finally found a worthy groom for you, darling,” announced Father, as he wiped off his lips with a napkin.

 

Laying on the knees of my oldest brother Cesare, I felt the urge to run back to my bedroom and throw up all the food I’d just eaten.

 

My second brother Enzo, who had been busily chowing down on an awfully smelly quenelle, slammed his fork down and cried out in protest.

 

“Not again! Father, how many times has it been already?”

 

“Enzo.”

 

“It hasn’t even been three months since her last engagement was called off! Regardless of what our family would gain from this marriage, shouldn’t you at least try to consider her feelings?”

 

“What a surprise to see you side with your little sister. Then would you rather battle the barbarians yourself instead of accepting Britannia’s support?”

 

“What are you talking about? Those savage barbarians up north wouldn’t stand a chance against the likes of me, the greatest, most noble soldier to ha—”

 

“Shut your trap, boy.”

 

The great noble soldier took the rest of the quenelle on his plate and shoved it into his mouth, aggressively chewing in protest.

 

The marriage proposal wasn’t any surprise to me though. I knew that it would come sooner or later.

 

“Who is it, Father?”, I asked cheerfully.

 

My father, who had been staring disapprovingly at Enzo, looked back my way and smiled.

 

“He’s Britannia’s hero. The king’s beloved nephew and famous knight of the South. He’s very handsome, I’m sure you’ll like him.”

 

“What! Father, do you know how bad his reputation is?!”

 

“Boy, was I talking to you?”

 

Enzo became quiet again.

 

any idea that this handsome knight would one day massacre their entire family. Oh poor, wretched

 

“Ruby?”

 

for me again. This time his long fingers groped the back of my

 

Enzo

 

you, Father. I’m grateful that I can at least be of some service

 

his lips into a rare gentle smile and pressed them

 

our sweet little angel,” he

 

I really wanted

 

had more pressing matters to attend to than throwing up. After all, the handsome knight of the South was

 

***

 

that I would be reincarnated as a lady in the Renaissance Era, and as a character in a novel that I’d read long ago, and, to make matters worse, forced to survive in an environment that was just as vile

 

was going to be reincarnated as a character in this novel, couldn’t I have

 

“Ugh!”

 

silently that I

 

an eating disorder. Before I became Rudbeckia de Borgia—I mean before I died—I was

 

I was born. Like my adoptive siblings, I attended a

 

think the first time I felt different than the kids around me was sometime around 4th grade, when a boy in my class laughed at me while pulling back his eyes. At first I didn’t understand what it meant, so I just laughed along with the rest of the kids in my

 

for my life at home, despite the sophisticated, welcoming facade of my adoptive family, there was always an unspoken rule that I was to be treated differently, that I was

 

separate lover, and my second brother, who was a rising tennis star, was publicly exposed for his promiscuous private life and drug addiction. The only one in my adoptive family who would sometimes treat me nicely was my older sister, and she

 

to play the role of a smart, cheerful, and obedient daughter, since if I ever brought the smallest bit of shame to my family or offended

 

just hallucinating before l passed away. But when I looked in the

 

Borgia, a character in the fantasy novel Sodom and the Holy Grail I used

 

was a story about the countries of the North and the clergy bravely rising up and banding

 

name ‘Sodom’ in the title referred to the people of the northern Romagna region of Italy, and ‘Holy Grail’ was a metaphor for the holy site

 

and to die no less than at the hands of

 

brother, in an attempt to gain even more political influence, were hellbent on marrying off Rudbeckia, and after three unsuccessful engagements

 

as noble and austere as Izek would lose his mind and decide to murder his wife’s entire

 

love that made him lose his mind, it was hatred—hatred of Rudbeckia, who’d poisoned his little sister. Cesare had miscalculated the severity of Izek’s

 

than being mad about Rudbeckia killing his little sister, it seems like Izek just got fed

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