Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

5. Shoot out

Nothing about the day spelled disaster. The sun was shining and everything seemed to be well in place as I drove down the familiar streets.

The chapel was fully packed when we arrived. Almost everyone had come to pay their last respects.

I surveyed the place and was satisfied to see everything was in place. None of the others had been much help when it came to the burial preparation. I was the one that was left to shoulder the weight of everything.

I didn’t complain though. I took it as a chance for me to reciprocate what he’d done for me. After all, he had fed me, clothed me and put a room over my head.

The service was about to begin and most people were already seated. I decided to sit on the opposite side. It didn’t feel right sitting with the rest. It especially didn’t feel right sitting next to Emma.

“Mom, why are we sitting here…shouldn’t we sit next to grandma?” Noah asks, pointing at where the others were.

Of course we were getting weird looks but I didn’t care. After all, it wasn’t a secret that I wasn’t wholly accepted by the family after everything that happened.

“Most people are already seated. I don’t want us to cause a fracas” I lie.

He looks like he doesn’t believe me but choses to let it go. The father arrives and the sermon begins just as I feel someone sit next to me.

I tense. I would know his presence and cologne anywhere. I don’t know what he was doing seated here. He should be with his precious Emma. In fact I would prefer if he were there.

Damn I sound bitter. Which I was. Bitter, angry and hurt.

“Dad” Noah whisper yells, which causes a few people to turn and look at us.

I glower at them making them turn back around.

between the two of you?” Noah

small miracles. I wouldn’t have

switch seats with him. The moment we do, I feel the

difference? Changed it and touched the lives of those that you met along the way? Or will you leave it with regrets?”

care? Whom am I kidding? They wouldn’t. They would probably hold a celebratory feast. The only

don’t have any friends mostly because I hold myself back. Living under the perfect shadow that was Emma nailed in the fact that I can never be good enough for anyone. I wasn’t as beautiful as she was. S**y as she was. Smart as she was. Loved as she was. I wasn’t perfect as Emma was. I was nothing

older, I’m still in her shadow. No one sees my pain or suffering. It’s all about Emma. Her pain is bigger than mine. Her happiness is

Noah’s voice pulls me

I realize that the service

his deep voice

want to talk to him let alone look at him but I’ll have to because for the next ten years we’ll

I just can’t

Noah, let’s

we’re bombarded by a crowd of people wanting to give us their condolences. I spot some of

yet and I

show your face” Emma’s bitter voice says

blotchy and her eyes were

so didn’t want to face

Can we just

I’m

but let me tell you that I am here to stay. You also took my family from me all those years ago but no more. I plan to take everything back, including the man that was meant to be mine” she then steps aside and leaves just as the preacher calls us to go to

and the departing back of my sister but doesn’t

of them were mine to begin with. The family she’s talking about worships the ground she walks one. And Rowan? Rowan was and still

lead Noah to the place that would be father’s

and me you would think that I was a stranger just

preacher says as they lower father’s body to

are the loudest as she begs for father to come

like this brings tears to my eyes. I hate seeing him in pain. I wipe my tears away. I

us to offer their condolences. I accept them mindlessly. It was like I was there but wasn’t at the same time. By the time I come

there is pa and ma” he drags me pointing to Rowan’s