Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

5. Shoot out

Nothing about the day spelled disaster. The sun was shining and everything seemed to be well in place as I drove down the familiar streets.

The chapel was fully packed when we arrived. Almost everyone had come to pay their last respects.

I surveyed the place and was satisfied to see everything was in place. None of the others had been much help when it came to the burial preparation. I was the one that was left to shoulder the weight of everything.

I didn’t complain though. I took it as a chance for me to reciprocate what he’d done for me. After all, he had fed me, clothed me and put a room over my head.

The service was about to begin and most people were already seated. I decided to sit on the opposite side. It didn’t feel right sitting with the rest. It especially didn’t feel right sitting next to Emma.

“Mom, why are we sitting here…shouldn’t we sit next to grandma?” Noah asks, pointing at where the others were.

Of course we were getting weird looks but I didn’t care. After all, it wasn’t a secret that I wasn’t wholly accepted by the family after everything that happened.

“Most people are already seated. I don’t want us to cause a fracas” I lie.

He looks like he doesn’t believe me but choses to let it go. The father arrives and the sermon begins just as I feel someone sit next to me.

I tense. I would know his presence and cologne anywhere. I don’t know what he was doing seated here. He should be with his precious Emma. In fact I would prefer if he were there.

Damn I sound bitter. Which I was. Bitter, angry and hurt.

“Dad” Noah whisper yells, which causes a few people to turn and look at us.

I glower at them making them turn back around.

the two of you?”

sigh of relief. Thank goodness for small

him. The moment we do, I feel the tension ease

you leave it? Will you have made a difference? Changed it and touched the lives of those that you met along the way? Or will you leave it with regrets?”

help but think about it. If I were to die today, who will attend my burial? Will those around me even care? Whom am I kidding? They wouldn’t. They would probably hold a celebratory feast. The only one who will be affected by my death will be

have. I don’t have any friends mostly because I hold myself back. Living under the perfect shadow that was Emma nailed in the fact that I can never be good enough for anyone. I wasn’t as beautiful as

Her pain is bigger than mine. Her happiness is a priority over mine. She always comes first in everyone’s mind while I’m left chasing after leftovers of their

voice pulls me out

then I realize that the service was

okay?” his deep

but I’ll have to because for the next ten years we’ll be sharing

it seems rude but I just can’t look at him. Not when the memory of him staring

on Noah,

we’re bombarded by a crowd of people wanting to give us their condolences. I

hadn’t buried father yet and I

finally decided to show your face” Emma’s bitter

face her. Her face was blotchy and her eyes were red and puffy, but she

sigh. I so didn’t want to face her

we just bury father

in so that I’m the only one that can

that I am here to stay. You also took my family from me all those years ago but no more. I plan to take everything back,

my sister but doesn’t say anything.

anything back because none of them were mine to begin with. The family she’s talking about worships the ground

the pain that wanted to drown me, I lead Noah to

Looking at them and me you would think that I was a

says as they

as she begs for father to come back to her. Emma and Travis both have silent tears running down their

as he cries beside me. Seeing him like this brings tears to my eyes. I hate seeing him

like I was there but wasn’t at the same time. By the time I come out

there is pa and ma” he drags