Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

Divorce decree

I get out of my car and slowly walk towards the mansion. My hands were trembling and my body was sweaty.

I still couldn’t believe that it was done. That I was finally divorced from him. The proof of that was currently in my handbag. I was here to bring the final papers to him and to pick Noah up.

Entering the house, I follow the sounds of hushed voices but stop in my tracks when I near the kitchen.

Right now I could hear them clearly and what I heard encased my soul in ice.

“I still don’t understand why you can’t live with me and mommy?” Noah asks his father.

My shaking hands go to my chest. My heart breaking at the sadness in his voice. I would do anything for him, but this divorce was inevitable.

Our marriage had been a mistake. Everything about us was a mistake. It just took me a while to see the truth.

“You know why Noah, you mother and I are no longer together” His voice is soft as he replies.

It’s weird really. That during the duration of our marriage he has never once spoken to me softly. It was always cold. Always flat and devoid of any emotion

“But why?”

“These things just happen” he mumbles.

I can imagine his face frowning. As he tries to make Noah understand so that he doesn’t ask any more questions. But Noah is my son. Curiosity and inquisition is in his blood.

“Don’t you love her?”

My breath gets caught at the simple heartfelt question. I take a step back and lean against the wall. Heart racing, I wait in anticipation for his answer.

I knew his answer. I’ve always known what it is. Everyone with the exception of Noah probably knows that damn answer.

Never had and never will. That was as clear as day. Knowing this, I still

throat, obviously

love mommy or not?” Noah asks again,

defeat. “I love her for giving me you” he

was a placation

still hurts. I feel my

those three words to me. Not when we got married or when I gave birth to Noah, nor after in the years that had

himself back through the entire duration of our marriage. I gave him my all but he gave

two, there were three of us in our marriage. Him, me and the love of his

rub them way. I was tired of crying. Tired of chasing after a man that

told you it’s rude to

deep voice cuts through the silent space. Interrupting my thoughts in the

near the kitchen counter. My now

grey eyes pins me

pride and joy. The only good thing in my life. His good looks are definitely curtesy

them

his half eaten sandwich down and jumps down from the counter. He rushes to

too, my love” I kiss his forehead before he steps

there awkwardly. This used to be my home, but now I feel out of place in it.

truth though,

with HER in mind. This was HER dream house, everything

indication that he wasn’t planning on letting her go. That he wouldn’t reciprocate my love for

asks in annoyance and stares at his watch. “You

got the divorce degree today and I thought I could bring you the copy while

and his lips form a thin line. Every time he looks at me like this, a piece of me breaks. I’ve loved him since I can remember but that doesn’t mean a damn

my soul. I continued loving him. Holding on. Thinking

love I’ve been craving since I was a child. I was wrong. Marriage turned to be a nightmare. I was always fighting with the ghost of his past. The

rub my chest. Trying to ease the

hurts even

to your room? Your mother and I need to discuss something” Rowan says through clenched teeth, the word mother slipping

us for a minute before

he

out of ear shot, Rowan bangs his fist on the counter in anger. His grey eyes are icy as he

interrupting my time with my son” the words leave his lips in a growl. His hands are fisted and he looks about ready to blow up