Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

Divorce decree

I get out of my car and slowly walk towards the mansion. My hands were trembling and my body was sweaty.

I still couldn’t believe that it was done. That I was finally divorced from him. The proof of that was currently in my handbag. I was here to bring the final papers to him and to pick Noah up.

Entering the house, I follow the sounds of hushed voices but stop in my tracks when I near the kitchen.

Right now I could hear them clearly and what I heard encased my soul in ice.

“I still don’t understand why you can’t live with me and mommy?” Noah asks his father.

My shaking hands go to my chest. My heart breaking at the sadness in his voice. I would do anything for him, but this divorce was inevitable.

Our marriage had been a mistake. Everything about us was a mistake. It just took me a while to see the truth.

“You know why Noah, you mother and I are no longer together” His voice is soft as he replies.

It’s weird really. That during the duration of our marriage he has never once spoken to me softly. It was always cold. Always flat and devoid of any emotion

“But why?”

“These things just happen” he mumbles.

I can imagine his face frowning. As he tries to make Noah understand so that he doesn’t ask any more questions. But Noah is my son. Curiosity and inquisition is in his blood.

“Don’t you love her?”

My breath gets caught at the simple heartfelt question. I take a step back and lean against the wall. Heart racing, I wait in anticipation for his answer.

I knew his answer. I’ve always known what it is. Everyone with the exception of Noah probably knows that damn answer.

love me. Never had and never will. That was as clear as day. Knowing

clears his throat, obviously stalling.

love mommy or not?” Noah

love her

was a placation not

of pain that fills me. After all this time. It still hurts. I feel my heart breaking all over again. I don’t know why a small part of me had hoped that

we got married or when I gave birth

I gave him

me and

fill my eyes but I rub them way. I was tired of crying. Tired of chasing after a man

it’s rude to listen to

deep voice cuts through the silent space. Interrupting my thoughts in the process. I square my shoulders and enter

stands near the kitchen counter. My now ex-husband,

eyes pins me to

pride and joy. The only good thing in my life. His good looks are definitely curtesy of his dad. He has my brown

them

and jumps down from the counter. He rushes to me and

before he

there awkwardly. This used to be my home, but now I

though, I

or unknowingly, he built this house with HER in mind. This

that he wasn’t planning on letting her go. That he wouldn’t

stares at his watch. “You promised you wouldn’t interrupt

I

lips form a thin line. Every time he looks at me like this, a piece of

broken my heart and shattered my soul. I continued loving him. Holding on. Thinking things will change,

we got married I thought I would finally get love. The love I’ve been craving since I was a child. I was wrong. Marriage turned to be a nightmare. I was always

Trying to ease the

fucking hurts even though we’ve been separated

Your mother and I need to discuss something” Rowan says through clenched teeth, the word mother slipping out

us for a minute before

he commands

Rowan bangs his fist on the counter in anger. His grey eyes

damn office instead of interrupting my time with my son” the words leave his lips in a growl. His hands are fisted and he looks about ready