Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

Divorce decree

I get out of my car and slowly walk towards the mansion. My hands were trembling and my body was sweaty.

I still couldn’t believe that it was done. That I was finally divorced from him. The proof of that was currently in my handbag. I was here to bring the final papers to him and to pick Noah up.

Entering the house, I follow the sounds of hushed voices but stop in my tracks when I near the kitchen.

Right now I could hear them clearly and what I heard encased my soul in ice.

“I still don’t understand why you can’t live with me and mommy?” Noah asks his father.

My shaking hands go to my chest. My heart breaking at the sadness in his voice. I would do anything for him, but this divorce was inevitable.

Our marriage had been a mistake. Everything about us was a mistake. It just took me a while to see the truth.

“You know why Noah, you mother and I are no longer together” His voice is soft as he replies.

It’s weird really. That during the duration of our marriage he has never once spoken to me softly. It was always cold. Always flat and devoid of any emotion

“But why?”

“These things just happen” he mumbles.

I can imagine his face frowning. As he tries to make Noah understand so that he doesn’t ask any more questions. But Noah is my son. Curiosity and inquisition is in his blood.

“Don’t you love her?”

My breath gets caught at the simple heartfelt question. I take a step back and lean against the wall. Heart racing, I wait in anticipation for his answer.

I knew his answer. I’ve always known what it is. Everyone with the exception of Noah probably knows that damn answer.

will. That was as clear as day. Knowing this, I still wanted to

his throat, obviously stalling.

love mommy or not?”

in defeat. “I love her for giving

a placation

my heart breaking all over again.

those three words to me. Not when we got married or when I gave birth to Noah, nor after in the years that had

held himself back through the entire duration of our marriage. I gave him my all but he

two, there were three of us in our marriage. Him, me and the love of his life. The woman he’s refused to let

was tired of crying. Tired of chasing after a man that

told you it’s rude to

the silent space. Interrupting my thoughts in the process. I square my shoulders and

kitchen

grey eyes pins me

My pride and joy. The only good thing in my life. His good

them

sandwich down and jumps down from the counter. He rushes to me and hugs my mid-section.

too, my love” I kiss his forehead before he steps away from me and goes back

there awkwardly. This used to be my home, but now I feel out of place in it. Like I

though, I

with HER in mind. This was HER dream

he wasn’t planning on letting her go.

he asks in annoyance and stares at his watch. “You promised you wouldn’t interrupt my

I thought I could bring you the

a thin line. Every time he looks at me like this, a

and shattered my soul. I continued loving him. Holding on. Thinking things will

I was wrong. Marriage turned to be a nightmare. I was always fighting with the ghost of his past. The ghost of a girl I could never

my chest. Trying to ease

It still fucking hurts even though we’ve been

to discuss something” Rowan says through clenched teeth, the

for a minute

fighting” he commands

ear shot, Rowan bangs his fist on the counter in anger. His grey eyes are

my time with my son” the words leave his lips in a growl.