Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

Divorce decree

I get out of my car and slowly walk towards the mansion. My hands were trembling and my body was sweaty.

I still couldn’t believe that it was done. That I was finally divorced from him. The proof of that was currently in my handbag. I was here to bring the final papers to him and to pick Noah up.

Entering the house, I follow the sounds of hushed voices but stop in my tracks when I near the kitchen.

Right now I could hear them clearly and what I heard encased my soul in ice.

“I still don’t understand why you can’t live with me and mommy?” Noah asks his father.

My shaking hands go to my chest. My heart breaking at the sadness in his voice. I would do anything for him, but this divorce was inevitable.

Our marriage had been a mistake. Everything about us was a mistake. It just took me a while to see the truth.

“You know why Noah, you mother and I are no longer together” His voice is soft as he replies.

It’s weird really. That during the duration of our marriage he has never once spoken to me softly. It was always cold. Always flat and devoid of any emotion

“But why?”

“These things just happen” he mumbles.

I can imagine his face frowning. As he tries to make Noah understand so that he doesn’t ask any more questions. But Noah is my son. Curiosity and inquisition is in his blood.

“Don’t you love her?”

My breath gets caught at the simple heartfelt question. I take a step back and lean against the wall. Heart racing, I wait in anticipation for his answer.

I knew his answer. I’ve always known what it is. Everyone with the exception of Noah probably knows that damn answer.

is he doesn’t love me. Never had and never will. That was as clear as day. Knowing this, I still wanted to hear his reply. Would

throat,

not?” Noah asks again, his

defeat. “I love her for giving

placation

hurts. I feel my heart breaking all over again. I don’t know why a small part of

me. Not when we got married or when I gave birth to Noah, nor after in the years

I gave him my all but he gave

two, there were three of us in our marriage. Him, me

eyes but I rub them way. I was tired of crying. Tired of

it’s rude

deep voice cuts through the silent space. Interrupting my thoughts in the process. I square

the kitchen counter. My now

pins me to

eyes shift to my son. My pride and joy. The only good thing in my life. His good looks are definitely curtesy of his dad. He has my brown hair

I give them a small

half eaten sandwich down and jumps down from the

I kiss his forehead before he steps away from me and goes back to his

there awkwardly. This used to be my home, but now I feel out of place in it.

though,

mind. This was HER dream

on letting

here?” he asks in annoyance and stares at his watch.

and I thought I could bring you the copy

time he looks at me like this, a piece of me breaks. I’ve loved him since I can remember but that doesn’t mean a damn

broken my heart and shattered my soul. I

got married I thought I would finally get love. The love I’ve been craving since I was a child. I was wrong. Marriage turned to be a nightmare. I was always fighting with the ghost of his past. The ghost of a girl I could never measure up to

my chest. Trying to ease

fucking hurts even though we’ve been separated

you go up to your room? Your mother and I need to discuss something” Rowan says through clenched teeth, the word mother slipping out of his mouth

looks between us for a minute

fighting” he commands before

is out of ear shot, Rowan bangs his fist on the counter in anger. His grey eyes are icy as

to my damn office instead of interrupting my time with my son” the words leave his lips in a growl.