Book Two – Ch.# 48

“What?!” I yelled, feeling as if my legs were going to give out from under me. “What did you just say?”

… You killed him,” she repeated, stating it in a matter-of-fact way. “Why are you so surprised? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you look so queasy about killing someone before.”

Was this some kind of sick joke? How could I not be surprised to hear that? I owed so much to Kieran that even the thought of ever physically hurting him seemed unthinkable.

“…Rheyna… the way you’re acting…,” she started, looking confused again. “It’s almost like… well, it’s just… you don’t have feelings for him, do you?”

Instantly, I became flustered feeling put on the spot. This conversation had taken such a turn that I didn’t know how to react.

“Well, I… I-I mean…,” I stuttered. “He did so much to help me….”

And Clarissa’s face paled even more, clearly not expecting that answer. “…I thought you were just joking. I never expected you of all people to fall for him, let alone give a shit about the mate bond. Rheyna, his sister literally tries to kill you, not to mention she brings doomsday. He’s just like the rest of them-.”

“-No,” I said, cutting her off. “No, he’s not. He’s different.”

But Clarissa just shook her head slowly in disbelief. “…This is a bad dream. I can’t believe this is happening right now,” she whispered to herself.

How could I be so different to my past self? None of this was making any sense. If this timeline was meant to align with the first one, then how was it that we had completely different mindsets towards Kieran? Let alone have it in me to… do that to him.

…Almost as if I’d never changed from the Raven I’d been for my father.

“You need to reject him as soon as possible,” she then said. “I mean it. There is a war coming, one that we will emerge victorious. But I can’t have you distracted from what needs to be done in order to achieve that.”

“Reject’? I already told him we couldn’t be together…,” I said, unsure of her meaning.

However, she sighed, clearly annoyed by my ignorance. “I mean you need to break the mate bond. Officially reject him. Normally, it’s one of the first things you do upon returning. Once there is no connection between you, it removes one more catalyst for Allison. Plus, it’s not like you usually care about magical bonds anyway.”

…But it wasn’t really the mate bond that had made me fall for Kieran. It was merely something that added to it.

“I need to warn you that it’ll be incredibly painful,” she added. “But the pain will become bearable if you just don’t pay attention to it. After a while, it’ll… sort of become like background noise. Or so you told me. Though I don’t think the dreams. ever truly stop, unfortunately.”

“That sounds horrific…,” I pointed out. How the hell would that help either of us?”

“…Because if there comes a time where you finally have a chance to end Allison once and for all…,” she started darkly, “…then I need to know you won’t hesitate in doing what needs to be done. We can’t have anything holding you back from our mission.”

I stood perfectly still, confliction flowing through me. She wasn’t wrong in thinking it had been Kieran’s influence that had stopped me from attacking Allison sooner, but… that didn’t mean I wanted to go through with what she was proposing.

“Rheyna,” she said, snapping me from my thoughts. I looked towards her tentatively. “I need you to promise me that you’ll do this.

Book Two Ch.# 48

That you’re committed to the cause and doing whatever it takes.”

“I…,” I fumbled.

Hadn’t I told Clarissa I’d stop fighting her and do exactly what she said? To put my faith in her? And whilst I hadn’t expected this… wouldn’t my pain still be worth it if it meant ultimately saving so many people?

“I… Okay,” I said, though my voice lacked any real confidence. “I’ll… I’ll reject Kieran when we next cross paths.”

Clarissa immediately looked relieved. “Good. I’m glad at least some sense can get through to you.”

She continued to talk after that, rambling off about how the rejection process worked, but the entire time she spoke, I just stared down at my hands. Almost as if I were seeing them coated in the blood of doing something unspeakable to Kieran… and it reminded me of something.

Weeks ago, when he had convinced me to try shifting in the Lockdale City Hotel, the time I had awoken from the blackout believing I had killed him… it had felt so real. I’d seen the blood everywhere, saw the large gash across his chest.

of him

cold shiver then went through my body, nausea filling me.

I didn’t recall my past lives.

“Rheyna!”

up

“Are you listening?”

stop thinking about the memory any further.

long journey ahead, though… speaking of which, we’ll need to

just the thought of carrying her again so

hunted? It’s not like we

I pointed out.

shook

hidden,” she said. “You don’t need your memories to figure that one out.”

of them seemed right. The safest place to hide from Ashwood had recently been

I could come to an answer, annoyed by

how to hide a body? Or… in this

recognition instantly clicked… followed by

you don’t mean….”

Just long enough to eat the soup and mentally prepare myself for the long

pass through, detailing how we’d find a car within the next town to help us travel but that we would need to make the last part of the journey on foot. She didn’t need to explain further about why. My first attempt at crossing the human border in a car had already gone terribly. Something made completely impossible now due to the fact that they

to

had been something nagging at me ever since Clarissa had demanded answers about the

a Saintess, one holding the power of the Goddess. An irrefutable command that forced

believe it was their own decision, their own choice. Completely undetectable as they took all responsibility for their actions. And this had been the deciding factor in how long

to influence the border guard.

that was noticeable to those around them, instantly alerting them to the discovery of someone capable of placing alpha orders over

Saintess could do… or, more specifically in recent times,

then that it really had been my fault.

day to make it to the next town where we stole the car, a half day to then drive as close as we could to the Silent Forest pack… and then, finally, one and a half days of trekking until we eventually made it safely across the border. A task that was made exceedingly difficult as we had to constantly be on the

did successfully make

the main road out of habit. “It’ll be another few days if we try to walk on foot to the closest human town.”

aware,” Clarissa said.

to walk all the way there,

made

like that, I could hear the sound of a vehicle then approaching behind us.

I asked

simply answered by holding out

we’re out here? There’s nothing around here for

think of something,” she

truck then started to slow down, pulling over to the side of the road.

mumbled, walking over

“What are you doing

…Think…

sick,” I said awkwardly. “Car battery died and

back to Lockdale. But wouldn’t it be better to drop you off at Swanston? It’s a lot closer and there is a hospital

medical condition. Her specialist lives

then wouldn’t it

I interrupted. “If you could help us get to

appreciate it….”

his expression softening as he took

the specialist. I’ll give you

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